How NOT to Break Up: A SasuGaa fic
by AiUchihaUzumaki
Summary: This is a parody of Shane Dawson's "Hot NOT to Break Up," with Sasuke Uchiha and Gaara! Warning! Emo, stupidity, Lee bashing...kinda...SasuGaa mentions of SasuNaru.


Hello and welcome to 'Hot NOT to Break Up: Naruto Edition.'

I don't own Naruto, nor do I own Shane Dawson, from which this plot basically came from. I am only a loving fan of Yaoi, SasuGaa (somewhat) and Shane Dawson!...That'd be one awesome threesome...*enters daydream mode*

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How NOT to Break Up

Sasuke Uchiha pulls up into a parking lot outside of Konoha Mall. His boy-toy, Gaara was in the next seat, his arms crossed over his chest. He was wearing a black tank and the tattoo 'love' above his left eye. Black tips were in Gaara's spiked hair and guy-liner cover around his emerald eyes.

Sasuke, who had a black shirt and black gloves with the fingers cut off, pulls his keys from the car. The two both held a brooding expression on their face and was known as the 'emo' couple. It was odd when these two started a relationship and everyone in school was very surprised. But because Sasuke and Gaara didn't care what anyone thought, they eventually shut the hell up.

"Alright, we're here." Sasuke says, refering to the mall parking lot since it was their favorite place to 'dread' upon. Something about making others suffer turned Gaara on, and Sasuke knew this and too advantage of it.

"You're in a handicap." Gaara says, in a monotoned voice. His arms crossed over his chest and not even looking in Sasuke's direction.

Sasuke looks over at his toy and asks, "how do you know?"

"Because you ran over a handicap." Gaara replies. Sasuke looks over to his left and out the window and sure enough, there was woman on the girl, her cane was crushed under the wheel, just as her mid-body was under the vechile.

"Help me! Help me!" She cried.

"Oh." Sasuke says, turning his head back to Gaara's direction and with a smirk, he says, "Ten points."

The two shared a emo chuckle. Which was them barely smiling and a odd motor sound came out from their throats. After the creepy laugh, Gaara rolls his eyes and looks the other way, same as Sasuke.

"Fuck you, you emo faggot!" The old woman says on the ground.

With the comment ignored, Gaara went on to say, "Just because you made me laugh my ass off, doesn't me I'm not breaking up with you."

Sasuke sighs, and turns to Gaara. "Baby, come on, I said I was sorry, what else do I have to do?"

Gaara shrugs carelessly, not really know nor really caring. After all, Sasuke's previous attempts to 'making up' with hi were all fails.

"I got you flowers." Sasuke points out.

Gaara pulls out the brightly colored flower from under his seat and says, "they're not even dead." He then tossed them out the car window.

"I made you a mix CD."

Gaara then grabs the CD that Sasuke had made for him which was label 'Gaara, Come Back.'

"The songs make me wanna kill myself." Gaara says and tosses the out the window without breaking eye contact with Sasuke, just like the first thing he'd tossed out.

"I got you Rock Lee so that we can take bath salts and eat his face off," Sasuke says.

Gaara smirks happily. "That has always been a fantasy of mine."

Lee, who was sitting in the back seat, finally knew the real reason why he was in the car with Sasuke and Gaara. "Wait? What! I thought we were going to see Madagascar 3. Screw this in the power of youth!" Lee saysm getting out of the car and starts running away with both Sasuke and Gaara just pointless watching him flee.

Sasuke sighs and says, "Baby, I said I was sorry, what else do I have to do?"

"You cheated on me." Gaara says, remotely sounding hurt, and continues, "and I may not be a big deal to you but it is to me. Some of us have feelings."

Sasuke looks back at him. "You do?" Sounding so surprised.

"Yeah, I guess I do...wow this is weird." Gaara says, realizing what he was saying and feeling and Sasuke looks at hi wide-eye a bit.

"What does it feel like?" Sasuke asks such a stupid question.

"Like I'm front row center at a Panic! At the Disco concert." Gaara replies.

"That bad?" Sasuke asks.

"Yeah, and you did this to me." Gaara says, looking back at Sasuke since he had turn his head to the dash board. Gaara starts emo crying, which there was no tears, but the unrudely sound from the back of his throat and he gets out the car, and slams in shut.

"Come back," The raven emo says, extending his hand out to Gaara but did little effort to actually stop him.

Sasuke was left to mourn in the lost of his lover, all because he stupidly cheated on his with a blonde dobe named Naruto Uzumaki.

The back door suddenly opens. Sasuke turns around and sees Rock Lee climbs back into the seat. "Now that he's gone, can we go see Madagascar 3? I've been practicing the song!" He says. Sasuke turns his head back to the wheel. During which, Lee grabs a rainbow afro and started to sing.

"Da da da da da da da da Circus! Da da da da da da da da Afro! Circus! Afro! Circus! Afro! Polka dot, polka dot, polka dot, Afro!~" Lee sang.

If as if god hated the emo. Sasuke then slams his face into the wheel, making the horn honk but without caring, Lee says, "one more time!" Lee then started to repeatly sing the Afro song while the emo was in the mist of self loathing.

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Okay well I thought that'd be something fun to do. I hope everyone enjoyed. And if you don't know who Shane Dawson is...you are dead to me...just kidding!

Thank you all for reading ^_^

Please Review ^^


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